A Bitter Victory

"I know that we've all been working hard this year, but corporate needs to trim some fat." The manager stood on a chair in all his balding, pit-stained glory. The broad, open office before him was silent because, apart from one person and scores of cubicles, it was empty.

The sole employee looked around to confirm she was alone. "You know there are just two of us here, right?"

The manager ignored her. "I argued with them. Pleaded! In the end, I talked them into keeping everyone but one. A bitter victory, to be sure."

"And of the two of us, only one does actual work? And it's not you?"

"The decision was agony." He scanned his eyes across a crowd that wasn't there.

"If you fire me you'll be managing an empty office."

"In the end, I'm afraid it's going to be... you." He pointed. She held up a mirror.

The manager's demeanor changed. Now he looked on the verge of blubbering and furious. "Fine, I'll go! I gave the best years of my life to this company! This is discrimination! Security!" Calling security on himself, he escorted himself from the building.

"I really oughta quit," the employee said.